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Question for Steph & Husbands of Hunters
@ 04:32 am (GMT) |
Joshua MayfieldMy wife and I have interests that do not overlap and we try to allow one another time to pursue those things and we see the value in them. But there are some things that we'd like to learn to enjoy together. Shooting and hunting have come up recently as activities that she would like to learn, particularly as the kids get older and become a bit less dependent. Any counsel for a husband who would love for his wife to enjoy shooting and hunting with him? Where to start, what pitfalls to avoid, situations not to put her in? I'm not presuming that your interest, Steph, didn't exist apart from Nathan. It's just obvious now that this is something you share and help one another in. I'd love to get your thoughts. |
Replies
@ 07:32 am (GMT) |
John D. Hays - New MexicoRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersActually, I would like to hear a woman’s perspective as well. |
@ 12:12 pm (GMT) |
Steph FosterRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersHi Joshua, I have been hunting and shooting for a long time now. I have to cast my mind back to when Nathan first introduced me to a rifle - you have to bear in mind that we were very young.Nath and I met and started dating when we were 16. 16 year old Steph and I are very different people but I think I would still be happy to be introduced to shooting today the same way I was introduced back then. First off I have to state that I had never shot a rifle in my life before I met Nath, no one in my family hunted or had any interest in firearms in any way so guns were not on my radar. I knew back then that there was no way I could have any kind of relationship with Nath if I didn't at least have a go with his rifle - I would never have heard the end of it for a start! The first rifle I ever shot was Naths No.1 Mk 3 Lee-Enfield and I have to admit I was pretty terrified. The way Nathan introduced me to shooting was by ensuring that the fun factor was the only real consideration. To this end we took the rifle to a paddock with lots of hillocks and natural back stops which had been recently grazed by a big herd of dairy cows. There were cow pats in abundance. The first thing I ever shot in my life was a big pile of cow crap at a range of about 20-25 yards with a standing shot. Seeing the cow pat explode like a geyser was so entertaining that it cancelled out any fear of noise or recoil. I think Nathan was shocked at the amount of ammo I ended up burning through. Having a large reactive target really got me hooked because of course the natural questions became if I can hit a 12" target at 25 yards then can I hit a smaller target and at what ranges can I do so? And because the pay off of immediate and dramatic success (nothing screams success like 15 feet of cow shit smeared across a paddock) was so big for me - recoil never even became a factor. So my first shooting experience was with fairly sharp recoiling rifle for an absolute beginner but because I initially only shot the old Enfield standing and at large easy targets recoil was cancelled out by fun and success. The first time I shot a goat was actually terrifying. Even though I am now a long time hunter and have shot more animals than I care to count I am still an inveterate animal lover. I actually think that a lot of Naths pursuit of extreme accuracy, geared towards the end goal of a clean kill, is directly as a result of hunting with me. I can not stand wounding animals - if I accidentally wound an animal there is no length that I wont go to to ensure that animal is dispatched as quickly as possible. I always use enough gun! Woman get impacted on an emotional level by the sound of a wounded animal (well I do anyway). An animal screaming in pain is very distressing to me therefore I use enough gun to ensure that this occurs very rarely. I will happily take as much recoil as necessary to cleanly kill an animal. If you want to ruin your wife's hunting experience then give her a light cartridge watch her wound an animal with it and then watch the disintegration of her shooting technique as she panics, desperately trying to end the animals suffering. Don't underestimate how important a clean kill is to a woman - especially a woman who has had children. If you are interested in getting your wife into hunting the most important consideration is going to be clean kills - put all your energy into the question how can I ensure my wife gets consistently clean, emphatic kills. Do not get bogged down with my wife is smaller than me therefore she should have a little plastic barbie gun. Sorry guys but the fact is; yes your wife is smaller than you but she is designed by nature to bear weight and endure more physical discomfit than you are. At least give her the chance to use big guns - she may surprise you! |
@ 12:30 pm (GMT) |
Bob MavinRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersWell said Steph.... Thank God genetics have immuned women from the dreaded Man FLUE !!! Ha haAll the best Bob[b] |
@ 05:02 pm (GMT) |
Paul LevermanRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersYou are one lucky man, Nathan Foster. |
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@ 07:51 am (GMT) |
Joshua MayfieldRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersThanks so much, Steph. Your points about the importance of a clean kill are spot on. My wife also is an animal lover, a mom, and I think a really messy kill could be the end of her interest in hunting. But she's tough as nails so your point about getting enough gun and not worrying excessively about recoil is very helpful. |
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@ 08:08 am (GMT) |
Nathan FosterRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersShe's telling you all my dating secrets.I set up my range near the boundary of the farm I worked on (Stephs family lived on the neighboring farm). After milking I would take a handful of ammo to the range (really not much of a range, just prone over a pack shooting to 100 paces) and hone my skills all the while knowing the noise would reach Steph. It gave me a chance to practice but was also a long distance hello (there was no text messaging back then). Sure enough she would hear the shots and come over to say hello Other times she would saddle up her two horses and we would take an evening ride. Some guys bring flowers, I was more of a bandolier of arranged ammo type of guy. Rather than the smell of a rose, I offered the scent of cordite and Youngs oil or a gift of saddle soap. And you know what, it bloody well worked. |
@ 08:58 am (GMT) |
Andrew MurrayRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersCheers Steph!This is great advice. I am sure this will help with my daughters too when they are big enough to get behind a gun. |
@ 01:01 pm (GMT) |
Chris MurphyRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersThe other big thing is where you take them. I made the mistake of taking the wife to a new spot I hadn’t been we ended up having to do a bit of rock climbing which resulted in a panic attack the only saving grace was there was a couple of deer over the other side so she soon forgot about the shear cliff we had to climb round |
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@ 02:47 pm (GMT) |
Joshua MayfieldRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersFive years are gone since I posted the initial question above. Steph's advice was great and I have kept it in mind, even though some things did not line up the way I would've chosen. A couple of weeks ago my wife, Brooke, made her first kill. I thought I would follow up and share a bit about the process.A couple of things factored more into the story than I foresaw. First, there are family dynamics on my wife's side that I won't dive into, but they played a significant part. She had some negative associations that were deeper and stronger than I realized. Second, our oldest son, Noah, began hunting small game in 2018 and deer in 2020. He had success and at an age where he was frustratingly un-serious about many things he took hunting seriously and worked to do things well. In hindsight, I can't help but think this played a role in Brooke deciding to give it a go. As I was getting things together for the 2022 deer season, Brooke announced that she was going to take her father up on a standing offer to buy her a rifle. I was surprised, but happy. I worked up a list of my recommendations for rifles and chamberings and waited to see what she brought home (I was hoping for a 22" barreled 7-08). She brought home a Ruger American Ranch in .350 Legend. I cannot tell you how important it was that I support the choice of firearm, and I'm thankful that I realized that in the moment. I could've wrecked the whole thing, I think, if I'd been critical or dismissive. I accepted that the cartridge would delineate limitations that were different than I had envisioned and set about figuring out what its merits and capabilities were. On the merits side, recoil is barely noticeable. Brooke could shoot a harder kicking rig, but the light recoil is a good thing. Also, it was a pleasant surprise in the accuracy department. Sub-MOA groups with factory ammo have a way of getting a man to soften his criticisms of a rig. My concerns were that the .350 could only be called "flat shooting" relative to a thrown spear, and effective range is limited. Fortunately, there is a lot of good hunting in our region where shots within 100 yards are the norm. Brooke likes shooting her rifle. One point Steph shared about the fun of shooting those high-tech reactive targets in the cow pasture reminded me to mix practice approaches when possible. There's a lot to be said for putting a highly competitive but new shooter through some on-the-move off-hand shooting drills with steel plates. 2022 hunting opportunities were limited and she never got a really good opportunity but she came into 2023 determined to get a deer. I'd like to write something someday on the experience of helping my son and wife as they started hunting. When I was in flight training, my instructor said "You think you're learning to fly, but you really learn to fly when you teach someone else to fly. I'm the one learning here." I have had some of those moments these past few years and I value them. A couple weeks ago, it worked out for me to accompany Brooke for an afternoon sit in a stand on a friend's property. If I just got my way all the time, I would hunt mostly from the ground and a great deal of that would be on the move. But I do like sitting in a stand with my son or my wife. Brooke is amusingly quick to decide that we won't see anything on a given day if we don't see something right away. This evening was no different. We started seeing deer several hundred yards away in the last hour before dark, far out of range. While we were watching the far off deer, a smart old doe came out of the brush behind us and did an instant 180 when we turned toward her. Brooke was sure we had blown our chance, and I probably would've made that bet too. But a few minutes after sunset a young buck came through. He was not as wise as the doe that spotted us, and Brooke had a perfect 35 yard shot. She fired and the buck gave obvious signs of being hard hit, but plunged into the brush and out of sight. The minutes afterward were a thing hunters know, but I'm not sure many others do. That time of reliving the shot, analyzing every detail, second guessing everything, hoping desperately that the animal is down is a thing I've known a long time and it was memorable to work through it with Brooke. My excuse is a bad angle and Brooke's is first time hunter excitement, but we didn't have the exact spot where the deer entered the thick stuff pinpointed. In our after the shot debrief, I became worried that Brooke may have held too far back. It took us just long enough to find blood to make me nervous. We were losing light, the underbrush is extremely thick, and the ground wet there so I did not feel good about our odds of making a quick recovery without a blood trail. Once the blood was located, finding the trail was easier than getting through the brush. I narrated what the trail said to me to Brooke as we went. The buck had been crashing blindly, and I knew he was not far. When we located him, it was that good moment that hunters know. What a privilege to share it with Brooke. Her shot had been excellent. Afterward, Brooke told me a couple things that I would not have predicted but that are interesting to me. She told me that as we were tracking and I was explaining what I saw in the sign, she felt a sadness. I understand that and I like that she had that investment in the moment and the animal. She also said that she is interested now in going with me on one of my backcountry hunts. She's never expressed an interest in that before. The other thing she stated, which was no surprise at all, is that she has no intention of learning to field dress as long as she has me around. Small price to pay... Thanks again, Steph and Nathan. Our journey into hunting together is quite different than yours but I think you guys helped me avoid a few mistakes that could've been costly. |
@ 12:15 am (GMT) |
Warwick MarflittRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersWell done team Mayfield. Thanks for the update Josh....Good effort from all concerned.Oh one last thing....Did she carry it out???? Cheers Warwick |
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@ 05:47 am (GMT) |
Joshua MayfieldRe: Question for Steph & Husbands of HuntersWarwick, Brooke's current worldview states that after she carried our four children for nine months apiece, I can carry as many game animals as she can ever kill and be happy about it. |
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